Spondylitis Association of America Forums General Discussion Men Only Message Board AS and dating

How do most of you men go about telling women you are dating or want to date about your disease? Do you hide it as long as possible, thinking it may cause a problem early on. Do you tell her on the first date? Do you ignore it, or do you let her inquire about it?

I am kinda lost on this subject. I think most girls would find this a negative in the beginning, the beginning being the imperative word here. Any feedback would be nice.

Justin

I wouldn't on the first date, but I would be square with them before too long. It's their life too, wether they want to be involved with someone with a medical issue or not.
If I were in the dating scene it would be painfully obvious as I am shaped like a question mark.

I don't think it would be fair to wait until someone has fallen in love to inform them. If I were to become single again *crosses fingers*, I don't think I would date. I've had bad experiences with women accepting me as I am. And if I really did care about someone, I wouldn't wish myself on them. That's just me though. I've been told I'm jaded. LOL

toby

Nicely put toby. I didn't think others felt that way and I was the only jerk. I regret having people watch this happen. Unfortunatly I got married before I got real bad. She is supportive but I can see it really bothers her. But I do believe that there are people who can handle it better than others. So I would make sure that whoever you decide to date is well informed of what it will be like for them as well as you. Then you need to decide if you can handle watching them suffer watching you suffer. But I'd wait till you know eachother a little before you tell her about a desease nobody's heard off. Just my thoughts. Hope you find her.